The Art of Dealing with People

The Art of Dealing with People by Les Giblin is a book that offers practical advice for building strong relationships with others. The author argues that success in business and life depends largely on our ability to connect with and influence others, and that this ability can be developed through deliberate practice and attention to certain key principles.

The book is divided into several sections, each of which focuses on a different aspect of interpersonal communication and relationship building. The first section, for example, is titled "The Basic Truths About People" and emphasizes the importance of treating others with respect, understanding their needs and desires, and communicating in a clear and straightforward manner.

Other sections of the book delve into more specific topics, such as how to handle difficult people, how to build rapport and establish trust, and how to motivate others to take action. Throughout the book, the author emphasizes the importance of being genuine, empathetic, and positive in our interactions with others, and provides numerous examples and anecdotes to illustrate these principles in action.

One of the key insights of the book is that successful communication and relationship building depends largely on our ability to listen effectively. The author argues that we often get so caught up in our own thoughts and opinions that we fail to truly hear what others are saying, and that this can lead to misunderstandings, conflict, and missed opportunities. To counteract this tendency, the author offers several practical strategies for improving our listening skills, such as focusing on the speaker's words, asking clarifying questions, and summarizing what has been said.

Another key principle highlighted in the book is the importance of being proactive in our interactions with others. The author argues that successful communication and relationship building often depends on our ability to take the initiative and create opportunities for connection and influence. To this end, he offers several strategies for making a positive first impression, such as smiling, making eye contact, and using the other person's name in conversation.

Overall, "The Art of Dealing with People" is a valuable resource for anyone looking to improve their interpersonal communication and relationship building skills. The author's emphasis on empathy, positivity, and genuine interest in others provides a refreshing and effective approach to building strong and lasting connections with others.

The key takeaways from this book

1. Listening is key: Effective communication and relationship building relies heavily on our ability to listen effectively. We need to listen actively, asking clarifying questions, summarising what has been said, and paying attention to nonverbal cues.
2. Treat others with respect: To build strong relationships, we need to treat others with respect, understanding their needs and desires, and communicating in a clear and straightforward manner. This requires empathy and a genuine interest in others.
3. Be proactive: Successful communication and relationship building often depends on our ability to take the initiative and create opportunities for connection and influence. We need to be proactive in making a positive first impression and creating opportunities for dialogue.
4. Handle difficult people with grace: Difficult people can be a challenge, but by staying calm, being empathetic, and focusing on solutions rather than problems, we can often diffuse tense situations and find common ground.
5. Motivate others to action: To influence others effectively, we need to tap into their underlying motivations and desires. By understanding what drives others, we can tailor our message to resonate with them and inspire action.